Wedding Speech Divorce
Ideas for an anti-marriage wedding toast or speech?
Preferably by someone officiating the wedding. Remember the Janitor’s wedding on Scrubs? Something like that.
Things like:
how marriage is a dead institution,
the legal benefits of it,
it’s history with regards to bride wealth & transfer of property,
religious connotations,
how at least half of all marriages end in divorce
it’s supposed to between a man & a woman to procreate, which is a crock b/c not all married couple can/do have any children
I love the “half of marriages end in divorce” argument. It’s so ridiculous. How many OTHER relationships last forever? A lot fewer than marriages that end in divorce. The “marriage is a dead institution” one is a hoot, too, considering how many people still get married. Hell, gay people are fighting expensive legal battles to gain the right. That is not a sign of a dying institution! The history argument is pretty much irrelevant. What marriage was two hundred years ago doesn’t matter anymore. And the religious connotations one is a weak argument, because the type of people who use religion to justify marriage use the same arguments to commandeer other institutions and concepts that do not necessarily have anything to do with religion. Considering that your last argument is related to the religion thing, I’d say it is pretty much bunk, too.
Therefore, to answer your question, I suggest the following anti-marriage toast: “I, personally, don’t want to get married. But what the hell do I care if someone else wants to? Whatever makes you happy! Have a good life! Now someone point me in the direction of the free bar!”
William and Kate Prince & Princess Royal Wedding asking Adult Questions we all want to know!!
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